Afternoon men of ManPlay! I’ve caught a bit of a summer flu unfortunately so I’ve been holed up with my fave thing that makes me feel better when I’m not feeling great: Bad romantic comedy DVDs. Yes, that’s right. If you have a movie with Jennifer Lopez or Jennifer Aniston I will be on board and feeing better almost instantly! Anyway, I was watching a silly romantic comedy where the lead went on a horrid first date where there was just no recovering from it. It started out terrible and just got worse from there. It got me thinking though. While this is just a silly diversion of a movie and the scene was clearly played for laughs, what are ways that you can get off on the wrong foot at the start of a date, but still recover from them to have a nice night? Easier than you would think. I know this is a situation that no one wants to think could happen to them or even want to prepare for, but haven’t we all been on dates like this? You start off excited for the date and excited to see  what your date is like and then things instantly start off bad and get worse by the second. What can you do? Head for the hills within the first five minutes of being there or stick it out, even though you know you have no interest in seeing him again? There’s another option: Save the date!!!!

First off, pretty much the worst thing you can imagine starting the date off: A case of mistaken identity. Let’s face it. Often we are chatting to so many hot gay men on a site like ManPlay that you can get confused about which person is which. It happens! Also, since people can look quite different in the flesh than they do in the gay personals, it is quite easily to get mixed up and approach the wrong person at the bar or restaurant where your date is taking place. If this happens, like so many things in life, I suggest you handle it with humor. By making a joke out of the mix-up you can ease the tension and hopefully smoothly transition into the date. By saying something that suggests you’re so happy to have found the intended person, it’s also a compliment to your date as well. If things were to work out as well, it makes for a funny how-we-met story! There’s no need to let your embarrassment get the better of you and have you stammer and make your date awkward. Try and keep your cool and turn that date around while also showing off your fantastic sense of humor right away.

What about if you go to a movie on your first date, as so many first dates do, and you end up going to a very provocative film that makes you both feel uncomfortable? If the movie is very depressing and deals with a heavy topic it might not be a film that makes either of you feel like doing much chatting afterward or having any sort of fun. So what should you do? Stick it out even though both of you are clearly not enjoying the film? I would suggest one of you turns to the other and quietly whispers ‘This really isn’t what I was thinking! Do you want to stick it out or would you rather go see what else is playing?’ This way you are showing consideration for your date being uncomfortable and if you decide to leave, you get out of having to see a film you weren’t enjoying. Especially considering it’s a first date, you aren’t going to be aware what your date’s comfort level is when it comes to content in a film. It’s smart to look into the film ahead of time and discuss with your date to make sure it’s something he wants to see. The most prepared you are, the less likely you are to be in for a shock once the lights go down in the cinema.

How about if your date spills a drink all over you? Especially if you are meeting in a bar, drinks are flying all over the place. I’ve never been one to get upset in situations like this. I feel like it’s something that happens and you can either handle it graciously or you can make a big deal about it. Making a big deal about it is not going to help anyone enjoy their evening any more so you might as well just relax. Always consider that it easily could have been you that spilled your drink so the best thing to do is just shrug it off and attempt to assure your date that it’s fine, because he’ll be feeling clumsy and embarrassed about it so you might as well put his mind at ease as much as you can. Think about how embarrassed you would be if you were the one that spilled the drink and then try and think about how you would like your date to react. With a lot of dating faux pas, it’s smart to consider how you would like your date to react if the roles were reversed and then try an act in that manner. While it might not get you out of every situation, it will certainly help in a lot and make you both able to move forward and salvage that date – hopefully leading to a second!

What do you think of these suggestions, men of ManPlay? Have any of them happened to you before where either you or your date didn’t recover well from it? Be sure and write me or leave a comment here and then head back to the chat rooms of ManPlay and discuss with other members your tips! While you’re at it, let me know what are the movies that you love to watch when you’re home sick. I can always use more suggestions!

Terrence

Categories: Gay Dating Terrence