Afternoon to all the men taking a break from the gay personals of ManPlay! Hopefully you’re all getting prepared for a great spring weekend full of fun dates. If you’re not, what are your reasons not to? I know that everyone feels differently about what they are looking for and what reasons they have for not having the active social life that they want, but if you’re looking to give your dating life a little bit of a spring cleaning, read on!

Did you know it’s National Cleaning Week from March 26th through to April 1st? I didn’t but have decided to apply that to my dating life and I bet some of you could do the same. Let’s get started! Though I’ve admitted there can be a myriad of reasons people think they aren’t having the dating lives they want, if we’re being honest, doesn’t it generally come back to past relationships? Even if you haven’t had a serious relationship but feel like you have been burned in the past by people you’ve been on dates with or chatted to online, it’s going to make it hard for you to shake off those negative feelings and actively seek out the next gay hottie that you deserve. How many times have we gone out with our gay friends and moaned about how men have done us wrong in the past? This usually stops when someone realizes we’re acting very much like the Sex and the City girls, and then there goes a whole other conversation for the next hour. If you’re like me, this has happened on many an occasion. Is it possible we’re looking at it all wrong? Even if you had a horrible experience, think about how much you learned from that. By changing the way you view the past relationship(s), you are able to change the focus of your energy from the negativity surrounding it that might be more natural to you, to thinking about all of the good things that you learned as a result. Focusing on the positive will make it easier for you to consider going out again and trying again and hoping for the best, knowing that you’ve learned from the past.

Another tip I recommend is to start looking at your own sense of self-worth and trying to redetermine what it is that you are actually looking for in a man. Sometimes it seems like (without even necessarily recognizing that we’re doing it) we put a lot of self worth onto whether or not we are in a relationship and on what he thinks about us. Break that cycle now and really evaluate what sort of gay man you are looking for, knowing that it shouldn’t determine how you feel about yourself whether or not you are single. It’s also a good idea to give your profile itself a spring cleaning! Try adding some new photos that show you relaxed and happy. People are attracted to people who seem happy, comfortable and confidant in who they are. Adding pictures with friends, as long as it’s clear that it’s your profile and not theirs, is good because it shows you are sociable and gives an idea of the sort of people you spend your time with. While on the subject of friends, if you find yourself hung up on the past and experiences that have happened before that continue to affect you to today, it’s a good idea to surround yourself with a new group of friends. Even getting out of the house and being as sociable as possible will do wonders for how you feel about yourself. If you find yourself becoming jaded and negative, take a look at your circle of friends and see if that is not how others seem to be acting in your group. Surrounding yourself with positive people will naturally affect your own outlook, something that will trickle down into all aspects of your life, including your dating life.

How do you feel about these tips? Ready to give yourself – and your profile! – a dose of spring cleaning? Write and let me know what you think of the suggestions. I’m trying to put them into place for myself. They are definitely easier said than done, but are worth the hard work when you find yourself thinking positively and looking forward to the future. Let me know how it all goes and have a great weekend, everyone!

John xo

Categories: Gay Personals John